I saw Huang Wen Yong's acting in the cop show at 9pm this evening.. when he realised that his wife was long dead, and he was hallucinating about her presence.. his crying touched me quite abit.

For couples who have been together through friendship, courtship, marriage, watching the children grow up.. many years together.. to lose their partners at a point in life.. is heart wrenching..

I always remember how my grandma cried when my grandpa passed away suddenly.. they have been together for more than 30-40 years, my grandma was really sad and kept repeating that my grandpa did not have a chance to experience the better times in life together.. they had suffered through WW2 (where my grandpa was one of those almost killed by the japs), a traffic accident (grandpa on bicycle) and a number of other things together..

My grandma used to love to chat with my grandpa as she is cooking dinner and he was in the shower.. that scene is deeply etched in my heart, which i now understand as love showing itself in a subtle way..

A time will come when it is my turn to go. My only wish then is for my children to be with her, to comfort her and hold her close.

This is what I do. Major thing for us to have this image featured so big on the papers.

Truthfully, when I get really demoralized about progression, it is things like this that gets me excited all over again. Nevertheless, I am aware that these excitments cannot provide for many of the other needs I want.

That's working life I guess, a trade off between passion and material rewards...

Sometimes, I do feel that not everyone where I work share the same excitment as me when things like these happen as well..

My guess is that my time is up

I have been enjoying what i do everyday, getting a high when special events happen as a result of my work. But i am really in need of a clear path on which i can continue to develop. I worry that I have stagnated and no longer learning. I need the next phase right now.

Friends who have choosen the safe path are progressing very well, even though i am confident i would not have taken that same path as them, I do wonder if I would have been happier with the financial rewards that come with that.

I love my work, but I guess as each day becomes the same, its time for me to move.

I hope that day where a change is possible, comes soon. I will leave a lasting and welcomed legacy for my current workplace, please grant me the strenght to be patient.

There's this grown tree right where every morning i wait for my bus to work. My guess is that it has been there for years, since my estate was being built.. around 20 years now..
Around the end of every year, it will go through a shedding process where its leaves will all turn yellow and start to drop.. i used to avoid the tree during that season as the dropped leaves will very much fall onto and get stuck on my gatsby-waxed hair..
Wierdly, a few months ago, during a particularly dry spell.. the tree started shedding out of schedule.. on mornings i wait for the bus, i realise that the whole floor was filled with the small yellow leaves...

My first thought was that the tree was going to die..a disease infection perhaps? The other trees next to it was doing fine and were not shedding at all..

I took a look at the tree again today.. it was lusciously green and look as dense as the hair on a teenage boy's head.. swaying in unison with the wind (i just love the rustle of leaves in strong winds)

Our big friend has gone through the bad bout by shedding and preserving the most important part of itself in order to grow stronger. What it shed also helped itself by fertilizing the ground on which it stands. Although it went through a point where all seems very bleak (at least to me), our big friend moved to help itself.. That's a lesson for me to learn.. particularly at this point in life.

I will still stand below that tree every morning, hoping to learn the next lessons in life.

You are The Magician

Skill, wisdom, adaptation. Craft, cunning, depending on dignity.

Eleoquent and charismatic both verbally and in writing,
you are clever, witty, inventive and persuasive.

The Magician is the male power of creation, creation by willpower and desire. In that ancient sense, it is the ability to make things so just by speaking them aloud. Reflecting this is the fact that the Magician is represented by Mercury. He represents the gift of tongues, a smooth talker, a salesman. Also clever with the slight of hand and a medicine man - either a real doctor or someone trying to sell you snake oil.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Bodhisattva Avalokitesvara, while deeply immersed in prajna paramita, clearly perceived the empty nature of the five skandhas, and transcended all suffering. Sariputra! Form is not different from emptiness, emptiness is not different from form. Form is emptiness, emptiness is form. So it is with feeling, conception, volition, and consciousness.Sariputra! All dharmas are empty in character; neither arising nor ceasing, neither impure nor pure, neither increasing nor decreasing. Therefore, in emptiness, there is no form; there is no feeling, conception, volition, or consciousness; no eye, ear, nose, tongue, body, or mind; no form, sound, smell, taste, touch, or dharmas; no realm of vision, and so forth, up to no realm of mind-consciousness; no ignorance or ending of ignorance, and so forth, up to no aging and death or ending of aging and death. There is no suffering, no cause, no extinction, no path. There is no wisdom and no attainment. There is nothing to be attained. By way of prajna paramita, the bodhisattva's mind is free from hindrances. With no hindrances, there is no fear; freed from all distortion and delusion, ultimate nirvana is reached. By way of prajna paramita, Buddhas of the past, present, and future, attain anuttara-samyak-sambodhi. Therefore, prajna paramita is the great powerful mantra, the great enlightening mantra, the supreme and peerless mantra. It can remove all suffering. This is the truth beyond all doubt. And the prajna paramita mantra is spoken thus:
Gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha